


TAZ Balance Filled Prompts

by athenasdragon



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-15
Updated: 2019-01-15
Packaged: 2019-10-10 14:59:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17428151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/athenasdragon/pseuds/athenasdragon
Summary: Chapter 1: Taakitz flower shop/tattoo parlor AUChapter 2: Blupjeans have some fun teasing Taako about Kravitz (post canon)Chapter 3: Stolen Century oneshot with Blupjeans liches + IPRE family dynamics (canon compliant)Chapter 4: Post-Story and Song Magnus/Julia Angst (canon compliant)





	1. Taakitz Tattoo Parlor/Flower Shop AU

**Author's Note:**

> Backing some stuff up to the archive that I've previously only posted on Tumblr. :) Find me there under the same username.

Kravitz couldn’t afford to wait to visit the property before agreeing to rent it. It was the only available shop on Neverwinter’s main street, recently vacated when the little bar it last held had gone under. The landlord, Queenie Raven, assured him that it was in good repair when he rushed to her office to sign the papers—her tone suggested that she was offended he had felt he needed to ask. He had the keys in his hand that very afternoon.

He drove straight to the shop. Rush hour was in full swing, and by the time he found a parking spot, the summer sun was low and golden where it gleamed between the buildings. Kravitz could barely contain his excitement; his heart was beating as though for the first time, a hard and steady rhythm against his ribs as he nearly skipped past a plain storefront with a placard in the window advertising a private eye. He had to catch himself from stumbling as a tired-looking woman stepped out of Balance Books and turned to lock up. The very next storefront should be it, and, yes—he stopped short outside, a soft gasp huffing out of him when he saw it.

It was unconventional for a flower shop, to be sure. There was still the low awning and dark wood door of a pub, although the owners had apparently tried to brighten it up with tall panels of stained glass in varying shades of pink on either side of the entrance. _That_ he could work with.

His hands were almost trembling too hard to fit the key in the lock, but eventually it gave way with a satisfying click and he stepped into the dusty, breathtaking darkness. As his eyes adjusted, he could see the worn tables stacked against one wall, the bar at the back with its slightly milky mirror, the shrouded chandeliers. He began to understand the appeal of the pink stained glass: diamonds of blushing fire lay across the floor, glimmered over the mirror and the exposed pieces of the light fixtures.

The silence was suddenly broken by a crash and a voice from next door, in the opposite direction from Balance Books. “Hey, uh, Magnus? What the _fuck_?”

Kravitz rushed back out into the street and over to peer in the window of the next storefront over. At first, his gaze met only rows upon rows of neatly-carved wooden ducks, some painted in bright patterns and some polished or even left unfinished. They were arranged on a bookshelf that blocked the entire window, as well as his view into the shop.

Worried that someone had fallen off a ladder or met with some similar accident, Kravitz pulled the door open, ignoring the hand-lettered “CLOSED” sign that hung from its handle. The scene inside was even stranger than the duck collection could have prepared him for. There were two men, one the size of a mountain and the other short and slight, but the shorter one towered over the first because the man-mountain—who could only have been Magnus, based on the earlier exclamation—was sprawled on the floor, surrounded by the broken pieces of at least three more wooden ducks. He seemed to have fallen off of one of several reclined chairs that stood along one side of the little shop.

Both men turned towards Kravitz as he entered.

* * *

 

“Hey, uh, Magnus? What the _fuck_?”

Taako came out of the back room at the sound of the crash. He had specifically told Magnus not to stand on the customers’ chairs for any reason, much less to add more ducks to the ledge at the top of the wall—the shop was turning into a wooden fucking petting zoo, but every time Magnus’s hands were free he seemed to manifest six more ducks in them that Merle would dutifully offer to paint. Apparently he had taken the opportunity when Taako went back to change to sneak a few more of the birds up beneath the ceiling.

All he could do was stand over his dumbass coworker for a moment, marveling at his constant disregard (or even disinterest) for his own safety. Suddenly, the door to the tattoo parlor slammed open, and the most gorgeous man Taako had ever seen walked in.

He was tall, with dark skin, an anxious expression, and hair piled atop his head in a haphazard bun. He was wearing what looked like a waistcoat—dorky, but cute—and Taako was glad that he had chosen such a smokin summer look to change into after work.

“Is—is everything all right?” the man asked in a heavy cockney accent, looking a little hesitant now. He winced after he spoke.

“Oh, yeah, peachy,” Taako said, rolling his eyes. “Hey, uh, not that I’m complaining? But the shop is closed, my dude.”

“Right, sorry. I just heard—I thought maybe someone got hurt.”

Magnus sat up with a wince, but he didn’t seem seriously harmed. Taako masked his relief by tucking his hair behind his ear, and if the motion was a little flirty, who could blame him?

“That’s real sweet of you to come running in here. My comrade here is just, uh, an idiot.” Taako realized there was no way he had ever seen this man before; he would have remembered. “But hey, what’s your story, handsome? You got kind of a bystander thing going on, just walking past and wanted to do a good deed?”

“Oh, er, I’m actually the new tenant in—in the building next door. The old bar?”

“Ugh, the Crystal Kingdom? That junkpile?”

“Uh, yeah, I’m opening a flower shop.”

The sound of rapidly approaching feet meant that Merle was about to hurtle out of the back room at the mention of flowers, and in that moment, the only thing Taako knew was that he was _not_ about to let his coworker ruin his chances with the cute flower seller next door.

“A flower shop? That’s fucking adorable, man, really, but uh, we’re closed, you’ll definitely have to come back another time.” He advanced on the man, who began to retreat nervously. The bell on the door knob jingled as he backed into it. “You come back soon though, all right? Hit me up if you ever want a tattoo.”

The man reached around behind him to open the door, but paused. “Did you say tattoo? You don’t just sell ducks?”

“Have a good one!” Taako called, jostling him out the door.

“Nice to meet you! My name is Kravitz!” And the door slammed on Kravitz’s hurried introduction.

“He seemed nice,” Magnus observed from where he still sat on the floor.

“Hands off, buckaroo. This one is going to be a long game, and you two idiots aren’t helping.”

Merle skidded into the room, out of breath. “DID SOMEONE SAY FLOWERS?”

 

Taako’s outfit: [shoes](https://www.primark.com/en/product/floral-embroidered-black-boot,R35397153013120) [bottoms](https://www.aliexpress.com/item/Women-Palazzo-Pants-Casual-Loose-Harem-Pants-Women-Wide-Leg-Trousers-Sexy-Front-Slit-High-Waist/32793232175.html) [top](https://www.lulus.com/products/tender-moments-white-off-the-shoulder-crop-top/466442.html)


	2. Unpacking Taako's Love Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We need to talk about what happened last night”for Blupjeans

“All right,” Barry announced to the room at large. “Family meeting. We need to talk about what happened last night.”

Lup looked up from the magazine she was flipping through, upside down in Barry’s denim-upholstered armchair with her legs crossed and sticking straight up in the air. “Oh come on babe, we’re all adults. I don’t think that’s necessary.”

A miniature strawberry rhubarb tart came flying out of the kitchen door at full speed, smacking her in the face. It left a pink smear on her forehead and slid down to rest, sticky and crumbling, in the tangle of her hair hanging down to the floor. She swiped a finger across her forehead and tasted it. “Pretty good, Taako, but a little too much sugar.”

Barry dragged a hand down his face. “Taako, can we just talk about this?”

“I can’t believe you two! I cannot fucking believe it!” Taako stormed out of the kitchen, flour-spattered apron flying and hair starting to escape from his sensible high ponytail. He pointed one long finger at Lup, who smiled innocently and twisted upright in her chair. “I invite the man of my dreams over to meet you, you insult my cooking and you make jokes about liches the entire goddamn time!”

“And I called the Raven Queen his mom,” Lup added helpfully.

“AND YOU CALLED THE RAVEN QUEEN HIS MOM.”

“Taako, I don’t think Lup meant to insult your cooking, she just said—”

“She asked if the stuffed chicken breast was Magnus’s recipe.” Taako crossed his arms and scowled as though this was the worst possible insult.

“So what? Magnus is a fine cook, what’s the harm in asking if—”

“QUARTER THREE, CYCLE TWENTY-THREE,” Taako shrieked, shaking his finger at Barry while Lup dissolved into uncontrolled laughter. “MAGNUS VOLUNTEERED TO MAKE STUFFED CHICKEN BREAST AND FORGOT IT IN THE OVEN. SHE WAS SUGGESTING THAT MY DINNER WAS _CREMATED_.”

Lup’s eyes lit up. “Get it? Cremated? You’re dating _death_?”

“Lup, I swear to Istus, I will put you back in that fucking umbrella if you don’t cut that out.”

“Come on Taako, what’s the big deal?” Barry sat down and spread his hands in a placating gesture. “You guys goof around like that all the time.”

“He’s being a baby because he thinks Kravitz is doing to ditch since we made a bad first impression,” Lup explained calmly. “Which is dumb, because his _actual_ first impression of us was during the apocalypse when I was in my lich form, and he stuck around after that. Also he’s head-over-heels for you.”

Barry furrowed his brow. “Is that what you’re worried about, Taako?”

“Barold J. Bluejeans, you stop analyzing me right this instant.”

“But Lup—”

“Sorry Barold,” Lup said, her voice pitching up as she suppressed a laugh, “only I get to verbalize my brother’s deep-seated abandonment—” She cut off as a gob of whipped cream hit her squarely in the mouth. She laughed delightedly and licked it off, turning around to sit upright again. “Every time you throw food at me you only make me stronger.”

Taako scowled and stalked back into the kitchen.

Barry turned to Lup and lowered his voice so that it wouldn’t be heard over the suspiciously loud banging of pots and pans in the next room. “Should we talk to him? I don’t want him to think that we didn’t like Kravitz.”

“Oh, he knows we liked him, dear. He’s in the phase where he knows we’re acting up because we approve wholeheartedly but he almost wishes we didn’t because now he’s embarrassed.” She cast prestidigitation to clean the last remnants of baked goods out of her hair and began braiding it up over one side of her head and down the other into a plait. “Anyway, better to get it out of the way before next week.”

“What’s next week?”

“Oh, dinner with the whole family and Kravitz. You didn’t have Wednesday plans, right?”

Barry whistled through his teeth. “Yikes.” He winced at an especially loud clash from next door. “You’re sure we shouldn’t talk to Taako?”

“And draw attention to the fact that he’s so in love with the grim reaper that he’s actually embarrassed of us for once in his life? Nah. It’ll wear off soon. Let’s just enjoy it for now.”


	3. Stolen Century Blupjeans Liches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Do you regret it?” for Blupjeans

The crew of the Starblaster never gets over the rush of relief they feel when they all materialize safely back on the bridge at the start of a new cycle. Magnus grins, eye swollen and purple, and Taako and Lup share a well-practiced fist bump. The last few cycles, Lup has then turned her gaze to Barry, and they share a bright smile.

“Cycle 86,” Lucretia announces, and ceremoniously closes the journal from the last year. They had been lucky; the Light had landed on a planet almost entirely composed of dark volcanic rock, so they had been able to track it down in just a few days. They spent the rest of the year exploring extinct lava tubes full of bioluminescent lichen and eating the sweet-leafed burgundy plants that grew near a few lakes. No intelligent life to mourn and no endless search for the Light, just a year of research and relaxation.

The twins share their habitual fist bump. “Cycle 86!” Taako echoes. “I got a good feeling about this one, homie. I am sensing some _cuisine_ this round.”

“C’mon, babe!” Lup grabs Barry’s wrist and pulls. “Let’s see if we can spot the Light!”

Barry smiles and allows himself to be dragged out onto the deck. The beating of his heart is a pounding rhythm that reminds him that he would follow Lup anywhere.

They stand on the deck together as Davenport pilots the ship down into the dense purple atmosphere of the planet beneath them. They stand on the deck together as the miasma envelops them and catches in their throats, sharing panicked looks as their hands fly to clutch at their necks. They fall together, unable to hear the cries of the rest of the crew from where they watch behind the glass.

And, in one synchronized motion, two red-cloaked figures blossom up out of the bodies lying motionless on the deck.

No one leaves the ship that year. They sit in claustrophobic tension and watch the purple mists swirl outside and ration out their supplies, which is made easier by Lup and Barry not needing to eat. After about half of the year has passed, Magnus points out that everyone else could have a bigger share if he took a walk outside and rejoined them for the next cycle. Taako smacks him over the head and he doesn’t suggest it a second time, but the words sit heavy on everyone’s shoulders as the meals get lighter and lighter.

It’s a long year.

Lup and Barry take advantage of their spectral forms every once in a while and float outside the ship to look for any sign of life, but each time they return disheartened. Besides, they hate to flaunt their comparative freedom to the rest of the crew, who are all suffering from severe cases of cabin fever.

One night—at least, they all estimate it to be night, but it’s impossible to tell—after Taako has served up a well-intentioned dinner that falls flat due to limited ingredients, Lup grabs Barry’s skeletal wrist and they slip away from the post-meal bickering back to the deck. They lean against one another and talk in soft voices about the happier cycles that came before.

“Oh, of _course_ Legato was my favorite,” Lup says with a chuckle. “Although the one where we became liches is a close second.”

“Yeah, that was a big one.” Barry laughs with her and snuggles closer, wishing he could feel her touch like he could in his human form. Behind them, inside the Starblaster, the argument escalates. It sounds like Taako is yelling about whose turn it is to do the dishes and Merle is trying to calm him down. “This one’s kind of a low point, eh?”

“I don’t know babe, being trapped in our lich forms for the _entire cycle_ while everyone else slowly goes crazy is kind of sexy, don’t you think?” She looks over at Barry when he doesn’t laugh. “Babe?”

“Oh. Yeah.” Barry looks out to where the dark shapes of their bodies are just visible through the fog—rolled safely out of sight of the bridge, but there nonetheless, looking desiccated and slumped even from this distance. “Lup?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Do you regret it?”

“Running out onto the deck and suffocating? I mean, it wasn’t ideal, but I guess it freed up some space for the rest of—”

He cuts her off with a shake of his head. “No, I mean, do you regret becoming liches?” He gestures around at their miserable surroundings. “We could have avoided all this. Skipped right to the next cycle. It’s—” he laughs a little—“it’s not exactly a rich existence, you know what I mean?”

Lup puts her arm around him and he imagines that he can almost feel it. “All the reasons we did this for are still here. I don’t want to do that to Taako, or you—and, you know, if something goes south and everyone else bites it, you and I can take the ship and get everyone back for the next cycle.” The firm assurance of her voice is comforting and Barry feels a little of his worry slip away.

“You’re right. Just checking.”

“You’re a nervous wreck, Barold, and I love you for it.” Lup turns around, as though to make sure they are alone, and then catches the ridiculousness of it. “This is a bad one, but we’ve had bad ones before. We’re all gonna get through this. No matter how many times Davenport asks Lucretia to stop scratching her pen.”

“Then maybe _you’d_ like to record the changes in the shade of purple outside every twelve hours on the hour, Captain, because someone has to,” Barry says, imitating Lucretia’s stern tone, and they laugh. “Yeah, okay. Just a few more months.”

“Just a few more months. And not to jinx it like Taako did, but I think the next cycle is going to have some _choice_ food options.”


	4. Mags/Julia Post-Story and Song Angst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flower meaning prompts: gladiolus- you pierce my heart. Magnus/Julia. Avi accidentally uses Julia's old nickname for Magnus.

“You’re kidding me—so you were in the mannequin? Like, your soul or something?” Avi shook his head and took a long drink of ale as though to dismiss the idea of something so ridiculous.

Magnus shrugged. “I don’t know exactly how it worked, dude. I barely remember how it felt to be honest. Pretty wild.”

“I mean, I guess ‘inhabiting a wooden mannequin’ is a weird place to draw the line after all the stuff I’ve seen you do, but come on Mags—”

_“Come on Mags, there’s a better way to do that than lying under the chair. Just—just turn the chair over, you fool, you’re getting sawdust in your eyes—”_

“What did you just call me?”

Avi glanced up. “Mags? Sorry, I’m doing this fun thing where I give people nicknames. Do you—do you not like it?”

“No, uh, it just reminds me of someone. No worries.”

_Magnus grinned up at Julia—it was at least partially a grimace, due to all the sawdust in his eyes, but it the joy behind it was genuine. “There’s no fun in that. Besides, I want to see what the sanding looks like from this angle._

_Julia burst out laughing and the sound made his heart stop. That was a sound he looked forward to hearing every day, as many times as possible._

Avi chuckled a little nervously. “Uh, maybe I’ll just stick with Magnus for now.”

“Maybe that’s a good idea.” Magnus ran a fingertip over the grain of the wooden tabletop and waited for his heart to start beating again.


End file.
